Tag: agape love

Sunday Devotion (Know God’s Heart)

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Shorter Sunday Note: We Need to Know God’s Heart to Understand His Word Properly and Intimately Know His Person. Remove the Heart and It is Not a True Picture of God.

Truly, I think (could be wrong), one of the biggest missing pieces sometimes in Christianity is understanding the heart of God. One can know the bible well, be anointed, and quote God and miss His heart.

The Pharisees knew the Torah, they lacked intimacy with God. Their interpretation of God was WAY OFF because they lacked true knowledge of God. They were religious and harmful. They cared more about being right by their eyes and looking pious than doing what was right by God. They neglected the most important things and focused on religious things.

Throughout history you can trace the misinterpretation of the bible back to a lack of understanding the heart of God and who He is and how He operates. There is no part of God that is not love. His love simply does not always match our understanding of love.

Knowing the very heartbeat of God and living out of abiding in His heart is what Jesus did. He stated His life source was living out of the Father’s love. This is one of the reasons Jesus was and is the most effective representation of heaven on earth.

Those who do not love do not know God (1 John 4:8).

A person can preach and teach and not know God.

A person can pastor and prophesy and not know God. I have met some pretty mean spirited pastors and prophets. And while they claim to just tell it like it is, many miss the true voice of God because the purpose of being a messenger for God is to connect people with His heart, not just relay information.

Those who do not know God will not accurately represent God nor release heaven on earth. Jesus was not rude, mean spirited, reckless, selfish, religious, hateful, political, sexist, racist, unfeeling, lacking compassion, disinterested with the poor, orphan or widow, interested in just filling meeting and not stopping for the one.

May we know God, and not the God of our traditions. May we know the real God of Abraham, Issac, and Jacob. The God whose heart beats passionately for ALL of humanity. The God who loves better than anyone on this planet.

Our world needs Ambassadors of heaven, not replicates of the Pharisee.

Lord help us (including myself) to know you, and know the height, depth, width, and vast expanse of your love. Help us to be like Jesus and live out of that love. Knowing your heart and living out of your heart is how the world will see Jesus through us. He said His disciples would be known for great love.

Warmly,

Erin Lamb

Empowered & Free Website

When Prayer is An Excuse Not to Love

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Morning Short Devotion: When Prayer is An Excuse Not to Love.

I am pro action. I believe our actions tell a greater story than our words. If I speak with the tongues of men and angels, yet have not God love, I am only making noise. I love that Jesus did not just talk about loving people, the love of Jesus was demonstrated through His actions, even to death on a cross.

Love came down and pierced through the darkness, not by ego or eloquent sermons. Love extended a hand, washed feet, mentored, discipled, and met with people outside the Temple walls. Love engaged on a personal level with the least, last, and the lost.

He stated:

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is upon me, for the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed,~Isaiah 61:1.

Love is verb and moves us beyond talking about the goodness of God to manifesting the goodness of God. The love of God, as Mama Heidi says, looks like something. I say, the love of God looks like someone, Jesus. All of His life centered around this one pivotal thing, “The Father’s love.”

I can see a person eating from a garbage can and offer them prayer. Or I can run to the store, if possible, and get them a sandwich.

There have been people around me who suffered great loss and I could have just offered prayer, or offered groceries, a listening ear, a connection with someone else who could help them, help them with their resume or send them job alerts, check in, go sit in hospitals/hospice with them, send gift cards, offer to hang out to take their mind off their troubles. Why? Love is demonstrative.

We cannot do everything, we can do something. There are some people I have said no to before. They sought to take advantage of kindness or I simply could not offer any assistance. I try to point people to someone who may be able to assist them. I did not have the capability to offer anything and it was not helpful. Codependency is not what I am advocating, where we think it’s our job to save people. I am advocating thinking of what is the most loving thing to do? What would we want done for us? Most importantly what would God want done for the person?

I love the story of the good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37) because he refused to leave someone in a painful and vulnerable state. When others walked on by, the good Samaritan saw an opportunity to love.

Recent studies have shown people are more prone to take photos or video of someone suffering or a bad accident than help. Please call 911. Don’t just watch someone drown hoping your video goes viral. Seriously.

We do not have unlimited resources. God does. I do not have the time nor energy to help everyone. I do have the ability many times to do more than pray. There are blessing bags in my car. I have helped people look for jobs. I have helped distract kids at the checkout so their mom has a break. I have baby sat for free so parents could get a break. I have offered odd jobs to people out of work. I have helped people clean houses when they were sick. I have given people free business start up advice. I have mentored for free. I have been a friend to the lonely. I have gone to hospitals and nursing homes and just sat with the hurting or taken my guitar. I have listened to people download their issues for hours when I needed someone to be there for me. Love is so very costly. It costs us something to love well. Yet love moves us beyond just sticking bandaids on broken bones.

God love will transform the world, not sermons, politics, religious programs, nor meetings. The world needs genuine love and concern. God so loved the world He gave His Son. The Son so loved the world He gave His life. If we so love the world, what evidence of love is present? If prayer is removed, what evidence is there of love?

For more devotions, check out Confident & Free:

https://www.empowered-free.com/shop

This weekend journals and books are on sale. I Thought I Knew What Love Was is already marked down. Use the Code Labor Day for Confident & Free and Journals.

Love,

Erin Lamb

Upcoming Events! (Book Signing Today & Live Webcast August 22, 2018)

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Hope you join us today in Columbus, Ohio for the Confident & Free book signing! There will be refreshments, a raffle, and the opportunity to chat.

Location & Time:

  • 1055 McNaughten Road, Columbus Ohio.
  • Noon until 2pm

Also join us on the author FB page August 22nd at 6am Pacific, 9 am Eastern for the Speak Life Challenge teaching.

I will teaching August 22 on healing soul wounds of rejection, trauma, abandonment, and walking in greater confidence with God.

I was trained under Dr. Charles Kraft and Dr. Scott Bitcon and have years of experience in seeing the soul healed.

Some people are seemingly stuck because they have unhealed soul wounds. I want us to be unstuck and thrive. Do you have lingering wounds of hurt, pain, shame, rejection, or trauma. God wants you healed!!

Stop by and check out previous teaching videos loaded. Author Teaching Videos.

Warmly,

Erin Lamb

Business: https://www.empowered-free.com

Charity: operationGodisLove.org

What is Love?

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Morning Notes & Stories: What is Love?

When we truly love someone or something, we take care of it. This is why I have struggled in life with people who rant and rave about how much they love something then treat it poorly. If we don’t water our plants, they die. If we don’t feed our pets, they die. If we invest nothing in our relationships, they die. Yes, there are times where we are not as connected or people grow apart. If we mistreat people, most likely, they will not wish to stay connected to mistreatment.

I do know the people I love, I think about them, I try to reach out sometimes. I cannot do that with thousands of people. I can do that with several dozen. Hey, how are you? I don’t want anything, just checking in or saying I was thinking about you. I try not to harm people. If we can not be a mega blessing, we can at least not harm people.

Love is not just a pretty word. It is a lifestyle of stewarding people, resources, time like it has significant value and impact. When we truly value something or someone, we do not put ourselves in a position to lose them. When we truly value ourselves, then we can love our neighbor AS ourselves.

Beloved children, our love can’t be an abstract theory we only talk about, but a way of life demonstrated through our loving deeds,~1 John 3:18 (The Passion Translation).

Over the course of my life I have met numerous people who say boldly, “I love this person so very much,” yet there is no evidence. Their actions do not demonstrate love, genuine concern, value. I asked God about this. He said, “People can only give away the love they have received. If they have not received My love for them, they will have nothing to give to you or anyone else. People who do not love themselves cannot love anyone else. The way they love Me and receive love from Me will be the way they love you.”

I have stated again and again that the order of love is not God first, others second, and us last. It’s not in the Bible. The Bible says, “We love because God first loves us.” It then says, “Love God, then love your neighbor AS you love yourself.” So the order of love is as follows:

God loves us first

We receive God’s love for ourselves

We love God

We love ourselves

We love our neighbor AS we love ourselves

God invites us to abide in this overflow of His love and I tell you we then are not forced, it comes naturally to love Him and others. I used to try the love God, love others, and put myself last. I mean that was humility right? I will tell you I mostly felt used, was grossly mistreated. Why? If we do not demonstrate love and value for ourselves, others will not either. The martyr becomes the doormat people wipe their feet on with no remorse. Give until it hurts is not wisdom. Wisdom says, “What is proper in this situation? Healthy self esteem and boundaries says, “I will love you the way I love me. I will talk to you the way I talk to myself. I will invest wisely.”

I had a lady I was helping get to church once. She was rude, slammed my car door-even when asked not to, called to dump her issues on me. I thought because Christianity can sometimes condition people to put up with crap Jesus would not put up with that I was just to turn the other cheek. Well I grew tired of her mistreatment and rudeness. She was treating me the way I let her. I will tell you I was far more fiesty before stepping into leadership. She would have slammed my door one time and had an instant come to Jesus moment. I eventually told this woman I was not going to subject myself to her poor treatment. I drove miles out of the way to get her each Sunday. Having a ride was a gift, not an obligation. She eventually stopped riding with me.

Love as stated before, does not position itself to lose what it values. She did not value being picked up and not paying gas. She did not value the situation so she lost it.

My last point is value yourself. It’s not pride. The bible says, “Do not think more highly of yourself than you ought to.” It does not say, “Be a doormat. Treat yourself like garbage. Think you are nothing and not worthy of being treated well.” To insult God’s handiwork is to insult God. God doesn’t create junk.

After college I was going through a phase where I was quite unhappy with the relationships I had. I did not feel valued by most of those people. I was never petty and did not understand why people acted in such a way. God posed the question of why I was choosing to be connected to those people. I thought it was the Christian thing to do. Befriend everyone. I learned I am to love people, and be friendly/kind, yet close friendship was reserved for certain people.

When we value ourselves, we value what we have to offer as well. We see that time wasted is not returned. If people choose to mistreat us, we set boundaries and for some people put distance. We do not owe anyone best friendship or a close relationship.

For more devotionals check out Confident & Free Devotional book. Purchase Confident & Free Book.

If you are in Columbus, Ohio, stop by the book signing this Sunday August 19, 2018 (noon until 2pm) at 1055 McNaughten Road, Columbus Ohio. You may register at http://www.empowered-free.com see the upcoming events tab.

Also follow the author page so you can stay up to date on events, see weekly live webcasts, and video teachings. http://www.Facebook.com/erinlambauthor.

Love,

Erin Lamb

Racism is Cured by God Love

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Morning Story: How My Racist Neighbor Became My Friend. God Love Overcomes Hatred.

When I moved into my house, they warned me of the old grumpy man who lived across the street. He was old, cranky, a former cop, racist. I was told to avoid him because he hated everyone especially middle eastern people, blacks, and hispanics. He would frequently call the cops on our Saudi Arabian neighbor (I loved Raja. He was the sweetest guy).

I saw my cranky racist neighbor as an opportunity to share God’s love. The only thing he could do was call me names. I only respond to my name. It’s not what people call you, it’s what you answer to that matters.

So when I saw him, I would smile big and say, “Good morning neighbor, how are you?” At first he was grumpy and grumbled under his breath. I kept waving, smiling, and saying hello.

One day I saw him hobbling to get to the mailbox. I asked him, “Hey are you okay? Are you hurt? Can I help you?” He looked stunned. He proceeded to tell me how he was sick, he could not drive, and needed to get groceries and his medicine. I said, “I can take you or go get those things for you! I would be honored to help you.” He looked at me with sad blue eyes. I saw a person God loved; a person Jesus died for. I felt zero animosity. I felt this deep well of God’s love and compassion.

Something broke in my neighbor’s heart that day. He let me help him. And I spent the next 3-6 months serving. Picking up groceries, checking on him, praying for him, and being a friend. We had fun chats. I even got him to laugh!! 🤣🤣🤣

He would stop by and say hello. One day he showed up with a dozen red roses and a gift. He said, “Thank you for helping me.”

When he could drive again he went and purchased a car just like mine. He stated, “I hope you don’t mind. I really like your car.” I laughed and replied, “We are car twins. I love it!!” He smiled so big.

I watched God transform a heart by His love. Hatred melted away with love. Fear melted away with love. Bigotry melted away with love. Pride melted away with love. I even asked a guy friend of mine to do home repairs for him and they became buddies.

He did not want to talk about Jesus and my agenda was not to shove Jesus down His throat. My agenda was to love him. Jesus said love even your enemies. If we only love those who love us, what credit is that to us? Even the pagans do that. God loves the entire world, even those who hate Him. Why? Because God is love.

Legislation does not cure hatred, pride, insecurity, and fear-God love does.

If we want to see the world transformed, it starts with God’s love! For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. When we position ourselves to love no matter who it is, we release heaven on earth. God love is our superpower! Choose love! ❤️

Love in Christ,

Erin Lamb

P.S join us tomorrow morning at facebook.com/erinlambauthor for the live webcast teaching on hearing the voice of God.

Honor Flows From Humility and Agape Love

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Morning Devotion: Honor is a Pillar of God’s Character. Jesus Walked in Honor of All. Dishonor Does Not Flow From God, It Flows From Pride and Unbelief. The Purpose of Honor and How Dishonor or Lack of Honor are Great Learning Tools.

Honor is something we give because of who we are, it is not to be demanded. We stand in honor as heirs of the King. We represent a King and His Kingdom. Jesus honored even the least of them and those society deemed less than, outcasts, and misfits. He modeled the heart of the Father for all, not some of humanity.

Honor is choosing to see as God sees. Everyone has tremendous value and worth to God. There is no hierarchy in heaven, no group more valued. There is no racism, sexism, or bigotry. The Kingdom of God functions on honor. Honor is rooted in agape love (sacrificial, unselfish, lavish love).

Honor is not agreeement with what is wicked. It is choosing to treat people with respect, dignity, and like they have value because Jesus died for them. It is seeing the potential of people. It is choosing to speak to a person’s identity and call them higher. It is choosing to speak life instead of death. It is choosing to bless instead of curse. It is choosing to pray instead of slander. It is choosing to serve instead of demanding to be served. It is choosing to recognize God values everyone.

I heard a minister say, “It is good a prophet is honored everywhere but their hometown and with their friend/family. It keeps them humble.” I disagree. Humility is a right assessment of oneself in relation to God. Being treated as inferior, less than, or insignificant does not match God. I believe pride and improper understanding of how the Kingdom works is what fuels dishonor. It is a pride issue, not something God applauds. They said of Jesus, “Oh that is just Joseph’s son.” They could not see Jesus as the Son of God and their pride blocked them from receiving the blessing God wanted to give them through Jesus.

Jesus said to them, “A prophet is treated with honor everywhere except in his own hometown, among his relatives, and in his own house.” He was unable to do any great miracle in Nazareth,[a] except to heal a few sick people by laying his hands upon them. He was amazed at the depth of their unbelief![b] Then Jesus went out into the different villages and taught the people,~Mark 6:4-6 (The Passion Translation).

[a] Mark 6:5 Nazareth was the only place recorded in the Gospels that Jesus was unable (because of their unbelief) to do miracles.

[b] Mark 6:6 This is one of two instances where Jesus was amazed. The other is found in Matt. 8:10. Both refer to the response of faith. Here it is the great unbelief of those who knew Jesus and lived in his hometown of Nazareth (Jews). The other is the great faith of the Roman military captain (a gentile). We have no record of Jesus ever returning to Nazareth. He made Capernaum his base of ministry while in the province of Galilee.

Lack of honor blocks us from receiving from God. God does extraordinary things through every day people. Some miss their blessing because they are chasing after who they think God should work through instead of who God sent. Jesus did not fit the mold the people wanted so they rejected Him. Those who rejected Him missed out on everlasting life. Maybe the greatest mentor for you is right in front of your face. I thank God for the people right near me who are full of the treasures of God. I see greatness in them and learn from them.

When we refuse to honor the people right in front of us, we are not honoring or loving God. He stated what we did to the least of them, we did unto Him (Matthew 25:40-45). The Bible states that the least visible parts of the body deserve more honor (1 Corinthians 12:23).

Think about your own child or someone you love. Think about if the people closest to them were the least supportive, the least honoring, the least respectful, and treated them as insignificant. Would that make you happy? Would you say, “Oh God is just teaching them to be humble by this disrespect.” It sounds a bit crazy when we relate it to someone we love. God LOVES us more than we could love anyone. God loves His children significantly more than we can love ours. He does not delight in people mistreating us or refusing to honor who He loves.

God bestowed on Jesus the highest honor. He gave Him the name above all names. God raised us up in Christ and seated us in heavenly places. God turned wretched sinners into a royal priesthood. God chooses to pursue honor. We were enemies of God and dishonorable. Yet while we were yet sinners, Jesus died for us. God offered us salvation through repentance and faith. He then lavished on us every spiritual gift in heavenly places. God is honorable. God invites us to pursue honor.

Lessons From Being Dishonored and Unsupported:

1. Even in Christianity there is idolatry. Some clamor for the celebrity Christian to pray for them or honor only those they deem important. It is pride. The Holy Spirit, Jesus, and Papa God are the only ones needed for breakthrough. When people make people their god, or set certain people on pedestal to be worshipped it is dishonoring of God. It is idolatry.

2. Being dishonored shows you what not to do to other people.

3. Being dishonored shows you how to pray for other people. Only a person abiding/soaking/living out of God’s love can give that away. So you pray for everyone, including yourself, to know the height, depth, width, and vast expanse of God’s love.

4. Being dishonored while you have little influence keeps you from being blown away by the same people who run back with honor when they see God promoting you. I am amazed how people shift their actions when they see someone they admire honor you. They offered you zero honor until someone else came along that was higher in their eyes than you and offered you honor.

5. Being dishonored shows you inner circle versus outer circle friends. We treat everyone with love, respect, dignity. Trust is another ball game. Access to the deep parts of our hearts is best reserved for those who will honor our hearts.

6. Being dishonored not being honored teaches you to rely primarily on God for love, support, encouragement, and friendship. You live for an audience of One. If no one claps, you get it done with God. If they boo or try to sabatoge your efforts, you keep your head high and walk with God. If they say you can’t do it, you get it done with God. If they refuse support, you get it done with God. God is the One you look to for identity and support.

7. Your motives are tried in seasons of dishonor or lack of honor. Will you continue to do what God said even if you are called to serve a wicked king, to serve ungrateful or unsupportive people? Will you stand on your assignment and choose honor even if dishonored? The assignment is not primarily about us. It is about glory to God. God does not delight in our mistreatment. I am not advising anyone to stay in abusive situations. I am saying when they go low, we go high. We choose to function with a royalty mindset and lead by example. Our motive is to love God, and honor God. Out of love for God flows love and honor for people-even the worst of sinners.

May you and stand as royalty in Christ and treat others the way Jesus would treat them. Jesus touched the lepers, sat with the tax collectors and worst of sinners, spoke to those others deemed worthless, ministered to the least, last, and lost. Jesus is our role model for life. There was no ego or celebrity about Jesus. He came and served. He came and washed feet. He came and showed the world how wonderful the Father is.

When we say we are followers of Jesus and then dishonor people, we are stating God does not love them. Why? Our actions are supposed to demonstrate who Jesus is. This is why dishonor, Christian celebrity worship, racism, sexism, and lack of honor need to be driven out of the church. It is antichrist. It says, “God is not love. He is selective in who He loves.” This is a huge lie. May we pursue honor.

Join us August 15th 2018 on the author Facebook page for our next speak life teaching. I will be covering discernment, hearing from God, what to do if you miss it in hearing from God, and how intimacy with God builds confidence.

Love,

Erin Lamb

Upcoming Webcast August 7th 2018

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Let’s connect!

Join me next week for a live webcast. It is lesson 2 in the 30 Day Speak Life Challenge.

This past Wednesday I spoke about Genesis 1 and our new identity in Christ. Let’s live on the right side of the cross!! We are not who we used to be if we are united to Jesus.

You may find that teaching here: Author Page Videos.

Tuesday for the Speak Life Lesson 2 (you can join us at facebook.com/erinlambauthor), I will be talking about navigating through hard seasons with God.

It’s easy to think positive and be confident when life is roses. What about when all hell is breaking loose, you are being persecuted, the bottom fell out of your plans, you are facing death or given a bad diagnosis, or life has sucker punched you? I will share some biblical insights from overcomings and part of my story of overcoming these things.

Tune in August 7th, at 9am EST, 6am Pacific, on the FB author page, and let’s chat.

See ya next week. God loves you. Enjoy Him today. He loves you with an everlasting love. ❤️

Love,

Erin Lamb

Get Wisdom!

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Morning Devotion: Gaining wisdom is vital to thriving. Let’s talk about relationships-great ones set you up to go further, draining ones sabotage efforts. God desires we have mutual and life giving relationships.

I had a very bad habit of giving people too much; too much access to me, too much availability, too much sacrificing for their benefit. They say you can never give too much-this is a lie.

Giving without wisdom is just as bad as not giving at all.

Giving in the wrong places, sowing into the wrong soil is just as bad as not sowing.

Let me break it down with examples. If I had a million dollars and gave it to someone who flushed it down the toilet, was that a good investment? No! They put the million dollars in the toilet and flushed it. They had no value for what was given to them. So they wasted it. Say they come back a few weeks later and asked for another million. It would be utter foolishness to give them another million. Yet let’s say you did and they flushed it down the toilet. They come back another time and ask for a million dollars. If you keep giving it to them, it’s pure foolishness.

How many times in Christian relationships is there a push to just give, give, and give with no wisdom? There is this push to give money, volunteer everywhere, give people-even toxic ones full access to your life, and just keep enduring abuse and mistreatment.

Jesus was not foolish. God is not foolish. God is a wise investor. Yes God allows His goodness to flow over the just and the unjust. God also invests wisely. God knows before He pursues us who we will become. God knew though Peter denied Jesus who he would become. God is purposeful, not aimless. There is a divine purpose behind everything God does and everything God allows. Even God has a boundary on who has full access to Him. Jesus said, “No one comes to the Father unless they come through the Son.” God also has an expectation on His love. God tells us He expects to be loved in return. He freely gives us love. Love given relationship with God IS expected to be returned.

“Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?”

Jesus answered him, “‘Love the Lord your God with every passion of your heart, with all the energy of your being, and with every thought that is within you.’ This is the great and supreme commandment. And the second is like it in importance: ‘You must love your friend in the same way you love yourself.’ Contained within these commandments to love you will find all the meaning of the Law and the Prophets.”~Matthew 22:36-40.

We are actually told the greatest commandment is to love God. God anticipates mutual love. I know this is not always taught, yet it’s biblical. God loves without our love. He does not cease loving if we do. God still expects mutual love in relationship. I truly believe one of the reasons humans struggle with loving other people is due to a lack of understanding of how to love God. God is their Mr. Fix it, or trunk monkey. He is not someone they engage with just because they love Him. Therefore they do not know how to just love other people.

We are invited to be good to people, even our enemies. This does not mean we become unwise and foolish. Get wisdom the bible says.

A prudent person with insight foresees danger coming and prepares himself for it.

But the senseless rush blindly forward

and suffer the consequences,~Proverbs 22:3.

Say goodbye to a troublemaker and you’ll say goodbye to quarrels, strife, tension, and arguments, for a troublemaker traffics in shame,~Proverbs 22:10.

Walk away from an angry man or you’ll embrace a snare in your soul by becoming bad-tempered just like him,~Proverbs 22:24-25.

So stop fooling yourselves! Evil companions will corrupt good morals and character.[c]~1 Corinthians 15:32.

[c] 1 Corinthians 15:33 This is likely a quotation from the Athenian poet Menander (Thras. 218). Paul is using this quote to encourage the believers to stay away from those who deny the resurrection.

Some Examples:

If Suzie only calls you to download her issues and problems, when she is bored, and sucks up hours of your time needed elsewhere, why are you answering the phone? Suzie is responsible for her own life and you yours. Yes we pray for people. Yes we love people. We also set boundaries.

I have sent people to ministries that have 24/7 prayer support, told then to pursue a counselor or life coach or soul healing or told them I could no longer be their stand in crisis person. Why? I am not God. I don’t want to be Jehovah Jr. I have limited time, tons of obligations, my own issues, and limited emotional capacity. God has no limits. I can not do all things. I can do all things God purposes me to do. Everything and everyone is not my assignment, nor yours.

If we are not careful, people will put us into the God spot. We do not belong there. Only God can be God. We have some limitations.

If Lucy has a bad temper and goes off on you regularly, and you have addressed this behavior with her and she never apologies and continues to verbally abuse you, why are you hanging out with Lucy? Why? Lucy has demonstrated with her actions that she does not care about you. Continuing to pursue closeness with Lucy is not helping Lucy become a better person. Lucy knows no matter how poorly she treats you, you will be back for her to verbally beat up again.

I am going to say something that may be shocking. Love sets boundaries! I repeat, “Love sets boundaries.”

What are boundaries? This is where someone else’s freedom ends where ours begins. It is self care, not selfishness. It is saying, “I value myself and I value you.” It is also wise stewardship. God expects us to love ourselves. We are told to love our neighbor AS we love ourselves. Boundaries examine what God has placed inside us and around us that needs guarded from just anyone and everyone having access.

I love the phrase, “Build a fence, not a wall around your heart. People can see its beauty, yet not everyone has access.”

If we do not gain wisdom in relationships, we can end up in toxic, abusive, one sided, life sucking relationships. How can I say this? I have walked it out. I just wanted to love people and love lavishly gives without expectation of return (in my mind). Like Oprah’s giveaways, I was going around to any and everyone, “You get love, you get love, you get love.” I would befriend anyone and drop my priorities to help other people. I would take vacation to help other people. I learned the following:

1. Without boundaries people treat you like a doormat or worse; you are something to wipe their muddy feet on and they do not respect you. Lack of boundaries leads to mistreatment, being used, and sometimes even abuse.

2. God did not ask me or you to be the sacrificial lamb for everyone. We are to follow the leading and prompting of the Holy Spirit. Yes give, yes love people, and also LISTEN to the Holy Spirit. I had an instance with street ministry where the Holy Spirit told me not to stop for this man begging. I did anyway thinking, “This could not be God. This man is in need.” That man was super nasty squared! God was trying to save me from wasting time, I refused to listen.

3. Some people and things are a distraction! Hear me again. They are a distraction. They come and suck up time and resources when God has other things for us to do or other assignments. Put some prayer on it. God do you want me connected to this? Everything that sounds good or looks good is not God. Learning to set limits and say no is vital.

“Thank you for your offer, I am unable to do that at this time.”

“Thank you so much for thinking of me. I am not able to participate.”

We can lovingly say no.

4. Lack of boundaries is a lack of love for self. I have always hated the love God, love your neighbor, then love yourself last. It is wrong. The true order is receive love from God, love ourselves and God, then love our neighbor AS we love ourselves. God expects us to love ourselves. How do we want to be treated? Why are we tolerating less than that?

5. Lack of boundaries fuels entitlement. Entitlement says, “This is owed to me.” Believe it or not, I have had people demand I be in relationship with them. Or they were quite toxic in choices, behavior and expected close friendship or tried to manipulate me into friendship. Ummmm no. Friendship and relationships are gifts, not obligations. We give thanks for relationships and try to steward them with love. They do not owe us relationship. If we are a poor steward, we may lose relationships.

There are people I love and pray for that do not have full access to me; their access is limited. They have shown repeadily that they are mean spirited, unrepentant, some hostile, and grossly selfish. If they were hungry, I would feed them. Naked, try to get them an outfit. I pray for them. I do not invite them to hang out and talk about my deep inner world. Why? They are going to trample it under foot or go flush it down the toilet. I do not drop my schedule anymore to help others unless God tells me too. I have priorities, obligations, and assignments from God.

This does not mean if someone needs 911 I ignore it. It does mean if I have project work to do and someone needs a ride they can call Uber. It does mean some calls can go to voicemail. It does mean I give people tools to see their own personal breakthrough. It does mean I don’t drop what I am doing for everyone. If I did, I would be driven by people not the Holt Spirit. It does mean I now take a year or so to assess people before I share my inner world-call them a friend.

I have offered way too many people friendship who came into the garden of my heart, poured gasoline, and lit it on fire. They were destructive. I am not wounded nor jaded. I learned something.

I stopped initiating with people who never ever initiated with me or only contacted me if I first contacted them or gave them something or they need something. I learned. Oh baby did I learn.

When people show us who they are, I believe them. I believe what people show me. I am not criticizing nor putting them down. I am assessing a situation based on the evidence. I then set boundaries based on who they are, not what they say. People can chant, “I love you all day,” yet their actions scream indifferent, just here for what I can get, or hostile. Yes we look for the gold, we also gain wisdom! We also function with discernment. We learn to hear and follow the Holy Spirit.

Finally, God wants us connected to people who will steward our hearts, time, and resources like He would. God takes NO delight in toxic relationship. Would we want our children mistreated? Hopefully no. God’s heart is far bigger than ours. God loves His children FAR more than we do.

Activation:

1. If you have children or had a child, what kind of friends would you want them to have? Write it out. Do your friends match that list? Are you that type of friend?

2. Assess who gets most of your time or resources? How are they stewarding what is given? You can waste time with those who have no value for what you offer. How can you better steward the time and resources?

-I have pulled back from super investing as a mentor in people who do absolutely nothing with what is given to them. Why? There are other people who will steward it well.

Bless you! Have an amazing Saturday!

Love,

Erin Lamb

P.S Be sure to check out my latest book Confident & Free Paperback and Confident & Free ebook. If you wish for a signed copy and love in the USA or Canada, please stop by my business website Lamb Enterprises LLC (Live Empowered & Free).

Raise Your Level of Expectations With God!

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God longs to exceed our expectations! Is our dream too small and our expectations too low?

Sometimes God blocks that door, opportunity, friendship, relationship, allows that sabotage, allows the heartbreak, or opportunity to pass by because He has a better idea!! As C.S Lewis so eloquently stated in the Weight of Glory, “It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

God is in the business of increase and upgrades for those who love Him. Every good and perfect gift comes from God (James 1:17). God does exceedingly, abundantly, above ALL we could ask or image.

Sometimes our dream is too small and our expectations too low. The greatest pleasure is found in God. The secondary pleasure is in His custom gifts for us.

As a loving Father, God will allow doors to close where we are mistreated or will not be valued. Sometimes that thing that did not work out was a rescue mission by God. Sometimes that opportunity that did not pan out was protection from drama, trauma, and heartache!

God is always looking out for our best interests even when we can not see it, feel it, or know. He is a loving Father who withholds nothing good from us! Thank God for the no!

One freeing thought God gave me once. He said, “I will never allow someone to overlook you who needs to see you.” Rejection is often His protection. And some will not value you until someone they value acknowledges you; that is an opportunist, not a true friend.

Be blessed today and dream BIGGER with God.

Love,

Erin Lamb

New Books Coming!

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First let me say thank you for subscribing to the book blog! Thank you. You are prayed for and loved.

I wanted to let you know of upcoming books.

It has been quite a while since I Thought I Knew What Love Was was published. I hope you check it out! People have stated it was a source of encouragement and helped them connect with the heart of God. It has a 5 star rating.

Book update:

I have been working on several books. One will be released this year. It is entitled Confident & Free. It is a devotional book designed to help others connect with the heart of God in areas of overcoming; overcoming fear, overcoming trauma, overcoming rejection, overcoming persecution, and even overcoming when facing death. God created us to live confident and free. The Spirit of God is one of an overcomer.

My hope after Confident & Free is released is to send out book 3 which is Killing Insecurity.

We live in a world that seems to be plagued by violence, abuse, mistreatment of human beings. We also live in a world where there is money to be made off of insecurity. Marketing says, “Tell them who and what they have is not enough.”

God designed us in love (God=Love), to be loved, THEN to love. We have too many people trying to love others when they do not love themselves.

Some people say societal issues center around mental illness. I disagree. I believe at the root is fractured identity and insecurity. Insecure people cannot love their neighbor because they do not love themselves. We can not give away what we do not possess. We cannot value another while hating ourselves.

Insecurity is the root of bullying, abuse, racism, sexism, murder, jealousy, domination, competition, many addictions, mistreatment…lack of healthy identity and love creates systemic problems. We can deal with fruit all day, yet change happens when we pull up the roots.

Our world has an identity crisis and love deficit. These things can be overcome by the power and love of Jesus. These books are not designed to be self help. They are written to hopefully lead the reader into an encounter with the truth of who God is and an encounter with His heart. Once we truly encounter Jesus our lives are never the same. The securest identity is in Jesus.

My prayer for us today is we would know the height, depth, width, and vast expanse of God’s love!

I will let you know when Confident & Free is released! I hope you pick up a copy and leave some feedback. Most importantly, know whether you get a book or not, you are prayed for and deeply loved!

Love in Christ,

Erin L Lamb

OperationGodisLove.org (Missions/Street Ministry Website)

P.S Check out facebook.com/erinlambauthor for daily devotions!