Do You Love You?

The saying, “Love God first, others second, and yourself last,” sounds noble. It is not biblical. The Bible says we love because God first loves us (1 John 4:19). Then we are to love God and love our neighbor as we love ourselves. We cannot give away what we do not possess. A naked man cannot give you a shirt. God desires we love ourselves as He does, then love our neighbor as we love ourselves (Mark 12:30-31).

One of the ways we demonstrate reception of God’s love is by setting boundaries and enforcing them. We teach people how to treat us by what we tolerate. What are your boundaries?

Boundaries protect what we value, so I have some boundaries.

I don’t tell men where I live unless I know them well because I have had several real stalkers. One I had to file a police report in 2018. I never gave this person any indication I wanted their attention, nada.

My instagram is private because though my pofile is mainly about Jesus, men would follow me and send creepy inbox messages.

I take roughly a year to watch and get to know people because of experiences of being too kind and people were not who they presented themselves to be.

I am slower to say yes to every ministry opportunity based on seeing everything that glitters is not God.

I pull back when I see red flags because I have traveled the road of ignoring them and it never turned out well.

I am more cautious being kind to men based on their wrong assumptions of my motives. Someone must vouch for them and their level of maturity.

I do not befriend everyone nor accept every invitation for deep, personal connection.

I do not just listen to what people say, I watch what they do and set boundaries accordingly.

I do not just trust clergy or Christians because they say they love Jesus. You know a tree by its fruit.

I do not go every place invited.

I do not pick up the phone for everyone, or pick it up past my rest time.

I do not spend copious amounts of time with people I do not trust.

I don’t befriend gossips.

I don’t tell everyone my business.

I don’t keep casting pearls before those who trample it under foot.

I don’t just give people money who ask, I pray and ask God. More giving is placed before Him lately. He knows what is wise.

I ask God to reveal who I truly am. I also ask Him to reveal tbe hearts of those who desire personal connection with me, so I know what level of access they need to have in my life.

Wisdom can come by listening to God/others and also through experience. I hope you love yourself as much as God does, then love your neighbor as you love yourself. I hope you have boundaries.

Love in Christ,

Erin Lamb

Relational Lessons Learned

20 Relational Lessons.

One of the greatest mistakes I’ve made in life involves misunderstanding love. I loved lavishly without wisdom. Gave some people VIP access who should have had outside the window viewing privileges only. Listened more to what people said than watched their behavior. In an effort not to be a relational snob, to be inclusive, I would befriend almost anyone. Not due to loneliness, because I like spending time by myself. I simply thought I was loving.

Here are some hard lessons I learned:

  1. Love and access are two different things. Love everyone (seek to do no harm). Give people who have earned trust access. Love is a gift. Trust is earned. Some people will treat your heart like it has no value, mishandle you. It’s your job to test who should have access. Guard your heart. Build a fence, not a wall. Everyone can see it’s beauty, not everyone has access.
  2. Some people believe they are great and that they have pure motives, and they do not. Ask God. I ask God to reveal who I am and the hearts of others. Not to judge, to assess levels of access. We do background checks and ask for references regarding jobs or child care workers. Why don’t we investigate people who want to be close to us?
  3. People who do not love themselves, or struggle with hating themselves cannot love you! A naked man can not give you a shirt. We give away the love we possess. An insecure person will struggle with your confidence or success. They may struggle with jealousy, envy, comparison, competing, putting you down, being unsupportive, or emotionally needy/entitled.
  4. If you are doing all the giving, initiating, serving, etc…it’s charity/ministry or associate not a friendship.
  5. Take time to get to know people before calling them friend or giving access to your heart/life. Everyone does not need access or to know your business.
  6. It is challenging to truly know who someone is online. Spend time in person if you can. I have met numerous people who appear like Jesus online and in person they are unkind, rude, selfish, and toxic.
  7. Don’t just trust a person because they claim to be a Christian, a minister, etc…goes back to point 6. Take time to get to know a person’s character.
  8. Some people are ministry assignments or associates, not friends. Friendship is a higher level of trust and involves mutual investment. Friends are trustworthy.
  9. Pray over relationships. God sees what we cannot see. Listen to God even if the person is shouting, “I love you so much!”
  10. We are not a great fit for everyone. Sure, be friendly/kind to all. It does not mean every person is a good fit for friendship.
  11. Some people are attracted to what you carry, they do not value you as a person. They are fans not friends. Jesus has tons of fans, far less close friends.
  12. You can eat at the table with Judas, wash his feet, yet not take him up the mount of transfiguration.
  13. God expects us to love our neighbor as we love ourselves, not more than we love ourselves.
  14. If you don’t set boundaries, people will run all over you. People treat you how you let them treat you.
  15. God wants His kids to have great relationships just like a natural parent would.
  16. They say you attract who you are. Sometimes you attract who you are not. If you are happy, you may attract negative people. If you are a giver, you may attract takers.
  17. Selfish people can be dangerous. They primarily think about themselves.
  18. Sometimes the person who flatters you the most is the least trustworthy with your heart.
  19. People say loads of things, watch what they do.
  20. Focus on becoming a wiser person attracts wiser friends. Get wisdom, gain discernment. We don’t owe everyone friendship.

Hope these tips help!

Here is a bonus sermon: https://youtu.be/3kwA9HQ0Zj4

Warmly,

Erin Lamb

Resources For Challenging Times

We know COVID19 has impacted numerous lives. Some people are depressed, stress eating, juggling kids and work at home, or unemployed. This virus has impacted almost every person on this planet.

I want to encourage you to monitor your mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical health during this time.

While it is noble to reach out to help others, your health matters too! Stress weakens the immune system. We want to share tips and tools to help manage the stress and keep you healthy. For example, there are certain foods/herbs that help with stress, like matcha. We want to share our knowledge with you.

Maribel Hernandez is a fitness and nutrition specialist in Southern California. She helps clients get back to basics. I have a background in soul healing and assisting people to step out of trauma.

Let’s move towards healthier living! Let us help you. I thought, “what if we call the course Reboot 2020?” When we reboot something, we provide a fresh start! People have been negatively impacted by COVID19, let’s reboot!

Along with tips on eating healthy on a budget, taking care of your immune system, detoxing your system, nutrition, and fitness…I will be sharing on tips and tools for maintaining health in the mind and emotions.

We desire you win in life!

Yes, storms (challenges) are raging around us. This does not mean we need to allow the storms to destroy us.

I hope you join us starting May 15th, 2020! Classes will be each Friday evening for 4 weeks via Zoom. Class times will be 2:30pm PST/5:30pm EST.

Sign up for a $300 dollar value course for only $24.99. We are reducing the cost because we know families and singles are trying to save money. Those who sign up before May 9th will receive an added bonus!!

Go to empowered-free.com/shop to sign up today!!

As an added bonus today, sharing a free teaching on Get the Trauma out from COVID19 and a soaking prayer for trauma.

Get your free resource here: https://www.empowered-free.com/so/f2N6FcA5T#/main

We are cheering for you! I hope you join us for Reboot 2020.

Warmly,

Erin Lamb

Founder & CEO of Lamb Enterprises LLC